Grandparents

I don't think I've thanked my sister yet for giving up her spot in the delivery room so Ned's mom could be there to witness her first grandchild being born. I was so tired I don't think I really noticed it until she came rushing in after the doctor said it was okay for them to come inside. My sister, Sheilah, is my best friend and I just couldn't picture her not being by my side at something so important but she knew there's be at least one more chance to be there in the delivery room and allowed Grandma Debbie to be there. Sheilah said she felt like she was there anyway. I guess I was so focused on pushing that I didn't realize that Sheilah was right outside yelling and cheering me on.

Grandma Debbie has stage 4 ovarian cancer, but has been doing well after her surgery and now she'll be going on 4 treatments of chemo so I pray she'll make it through. She is a strong lady I feel positive she will and with Kingston being her medicine she will be fine. She was so helpful when I was pregnant. She prepared meals, bought many maternity stuff for me and bought a lot of baby items in preparation for Kingston's arrival. She wanted me not to stress too much because I had 5 classes fall quarter and 4 classes winter quarter, with a load like that plus working, she didn't want me to feel overwhelmed especially since I was a first time mom.

I've never had anyone very close to me be sick and I honestly don't know how to act. I know how I feel about it and I keep that even to myself. I feel guilty for not being more involved, I feel like I should be visiting her more or offering whatever I could to make her feel comfortable. Instead I just find myself talking and acting normal' like nothings happened. The only thing I've done is pray and pray and keep positive. Someone told me its fine what I'm doing because not everyone is comfortable with cancer, and to just deal with it the way I need to. Right now praying and staying positive is all I can come up with to do. I hope its enough.

Ned grew up without knowing any of his grandparents so I know he's beyond happy that his mom is doing well and getting to know her grandson. I grew up knowing both my grandmothers and feel so blessed and also happy that Kingston still has a chance to get to know both sets of grandparents. Lucky kid!!!

Dang my mom is leaving Monday for the Philippines, I'm going to miss her. Not just because she's been helpful to me but I haven't lived with her for 14 years and having her here at the house just makes it really feel like home to me. My parents are selling their house so when they visit they'll be staying with me and Ned at our house. They even have their own room and my mom has decorated it the way she would if it was her own house and that makes me feel so good. I get them all to myself, sorry to my brothers and sister. I wasn't going to bring it up but I'm a bit upset that my dad still hasn't come back from the Philippines to meet Kingston, but I do realize that he's dealing with business and the plantations so I'm not too bitter. He will be here in June for my graduation, well at least that's the plan, so just a bit more waiting.

It's been since September 2007 since I've seen my dad. The picture was on Father's Day.